Another not-so-happy-marriage joke

[PrinceFisher]

[black][size 2]A husband was in BIG trouble when he forgot his wedding anniversary.[/size][/black]
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[black][size 2]"Tomorrow," his wife scolded him, "there had better be something in our driveway that goes from zero to 200 in two seconds flat!"[/size][/black]
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[black][size 2]The next morning, the wife looked outside and saw a small package in the driveway. She brought it inside and unwrapped it to find a brand new bathroom scale.[/size][/black]
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[black][size 2]Funeral services for her husband have been set for this coming Saturday.[/size][/black]
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[neveronsunday]

[red][size 3]I'm sure it was swift and he didn't suffer much.... [/size][/red]
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[TubeDude]

[cool][#0000ff]Hey Shawn, what's with the marriage jokes? Something you're not telling us?[/#0000ff]
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[#0000ff]Here's one for ya. My wife is concerned that after all the years we have been married, we might be taking each other for granted. So, she gets a tle in her eye and says "Tell me those three little words that set me walking on air".[/#0000ff]
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[#0000ff]To which I replied "Go hang yourself". [/#0000ff]
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[#0000ff]Love is grand. Divorce is ten grand.[/#0000ff]
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[mateo]

If you shop around a little, you can get it done for about half that much.
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[TubeDude]

[cool][#0000ff]Why are divorces so expensive? Because they are worth it.[/#0000ff]
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[#0000ff]Why do married men die sooner? Because they want to.[/#0000ff]
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[#0000ff]Sorry, Honey. Ouch, ouch.[/#0000ff]
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[mateo]

There's a lot of truth to that.[laugh]
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[PrinceFisher]

I have friends who frequently send me jokes and other lighthearted materials in e-mails. Most of it is just plain dumb, so I choose not to pass it along. These last two jokes I posted for the amusement of all BFTers just happened to be about bad marriages. Regardless of their similar topics, I thought they were particularly clever.

Though I've been known to rile the wife occasionally with less-than-intelligent behavior, for now we're sailing on placid waters. Now having said that, without finding any wood to knock on within arm's reach for safety's sake, I'll probably do something REALLY foolish, like spend too much on fishing tackle, which will get those otherwise calm waters all agitated and muddy.

Such is the life of a guy who spends far too much of his waking (and sleeping) life dreaming of ways to fool fish into thinking his pathetic, unnatural offerings are edible. Until I find a way to be an even better dad, a devoted husband, AND a skilled angler -- all at the same time -- I'll probably have to accept being a fretful father, a passable spouse, and a pretty lousy fisherman.[pirate]
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